It is just one of the ways… And I know God doesn’t have to use them this way. But somehow, in His kindness, He did! =)

I often make my amigurumis on the bus – on the way to work or on the way from work. The thought crossed my mind once… it would be good if someone actually starts a conversation with me – and ask me about them. And maybe I can somehow turn that conversation into something else? At least an invite to church? =)

But that never happened once in the 2.5 months I’d been doing that! Until tonight…. just when I least expected it!

I had the option of sitting next to the girl on the left or on the right. I chose the one on the right, just because I prefer to sit on the right side of the bus. =)

The bus was noisy and so I put on some music and started working on my current project.

Then I saw from the corner of my eyes that the girl next to me started paying attention to what I was doing… And then she took off her earphones. So I looked up and took off my earphones. And she asked me if I made the two amigurumis I have on my bag myself and if she could touch them. I told her I did, and she could. She then asked me if I made them for myself or for sale… And then the conversation continued… She asked some questions and I offered answers and help – all related to amigurumi and crocheting only! =)

Because of her many questions, I offered to send her some links to amigurumi and crochet sites.

We then chatted about other things along the way – where I’m from, what I do, where she’s from, what she does, how she is finding Sydney etc. When I realised she might appreciate help adjusting to life here, I told her that I have some church friends who work and are around campus more often compared to me and asked her if she’d like me to pass on her contacts to them. I told her I won’t do that if she doesn’t want to as I really only asked for her email to send the amigurumi links. But in God’s kindness, she said yes.

I didn’t tell much about my Christian faith during the bus ride. I told her I’d be praying for her and what I’m praying for her in the email I sent her… but yeah, the friendship has started. I’m just praying now that God will bless and grow it – and that in time this girl will be able to see the Person behind my actions and care (and the care of the sister(s) who will be in touch with her) … that she will be able to forget the channel, and seeing only Him…

The different things I read today:

SMH: The newborn has been receiving intensive care from keepers and veterinarians in the zoo’s heated elephant barn since his surprise arrival at Taronga Zoo at 3.27am today.

and

Taronga Zoo website: “When the keepers learned the calf had survived this morning, the looks of disbelief on our faces were quite a picture. We couldn’t believe that this could be true.”

It was indeed a surprise arrival! I can imagine that! I mean, I was SO surprised when I saw the news on paper late this morning, too!!! The baby elephant (or elephant calf – for those who care about using proper term) was thought dead! So of course it was a great but pleasant surprise! =D

It was interesting however, that one of my Bible passages for today is actually Job 39. And this is what the LORD says to Job in Job 39:1-3 says:

“Do you know when the mountain goats give birth?
Do you observe the calving of the does?
Can you number the months that they fulfill,
and do you know the time when they give birth,
when they crouch, bring forth their offspring,
and are delivered of their young?”

I thought… such contrasts!!

The keepers, even the experts (!!), were surprised! But not God! God was not surprised! He knew all along that the calf was alive and the time just hadn’t come for him to come out…

Job 39:1-3 isn’t just true “out there” – it’s true for animals in zoos as well! =D

In their letter to zooparents and supporters, though, they have this sentence:

The events of this morning have highlighted to me just how complex the challenges are in breeding and helping to preserve this magnificent species. Nature still has the ability to amaze and surprise us all.

My prayer for them, is that they will see that it wasn’t Nature that has the ability to amaze and surprise them. Nature was also created. By the Creator God. It was God who has everything under His perfect control. God and no one, and nothing else.

The calf has not yet passed his 24 critical period. God still can take his life back. (of course I’m praying hard that it won’t be the case). But yeah, whatever happens, it won’t catch God by surprise! =)

PS: Oh, and I know what they are going to name the calf if God let him live – “miracle” or something with a similar meaning! =)

I think people who think that they would never ever kill anyone – just have never met the ‘right’ situation yet!

I do sincerely believe that given the right situation, anyone is capable of murder. And not just the kind of murder that is out of self-defense, but the kind of murder that is really murder – that is, murder with the intention to kill!

Scary, huh?!

But I guess that just shows how black our hearts as sinful human beings are. And why we should never ever trust in the “goodness of mankind”. Because really, there is no such thing as goodness within us. Given the right situation, everyone is capable of murder. If you think otherwise, you really just have not met the right situation yet. Just wait. If you live long enough, it will come to you one day.

Which is why, it is just beyond belief how God could still chose to send His Son – His only Son – to die for us, even when He knew already how black our hearts are, and what we are capable of doing against Him!!!

I’m glad I’m not God.

I’m glad my God is not like me.

I’m glad His love is beyond my understanding.

The hardest thing for me to do now though, is having to follow, in my Father’s footsteps…

But see, the privilege of being a Christian is that you are not only just given an example to follow. You are also given a new way of looking at things! His ways of looking at things!

You know that He died not only for your sins, but also the sins of others, including the sins of the person who has offended you. And that because He is just, those sins weren’t just brushed off, but were really paid through the death of Christ!

And it is true… that when you lift your eyes from your current situation – whatever it is – and fix your eyes on Jesus instead, while asking God to give you His ways of looking at things – you will see a grander view. A view that might then help you to repent, and refrain you from grieving His Spirit…

YOUR EYES

A lily in the field may live beyond the human gaze
God knows when it needs nourishment, and when to send the rain;
He sees the here and now, the past and all it holds,
His view is unimpeded, and it stretches on and on forever.

A man could take a lifetime twice to put away a grudge
But God has seen the sin of man since Adam came from dust
He knew the weight of guilt, our past and future wrongs,
Yet sent His Son to die for us to put away our faithlessness forever

Give me Your eyes to see the love You showed in saving me from death
Your eyes to see the justice You have worked for the oppressed
I need Your sight to see the way my ev’ry need is met
In Your eyes I see the love that tells me You will not forget

A God who was not holy would’ve put up with our shame
A God who was not righteous, wouldn’t say we were to blame,
But justice has been done, and righteousness was served
When Jesus satisfied our God and took our sins upon himself forever

Give me Your eyes to see the love You showed in saving me from death
Your eyes to see the justice You have worked for the oppressed
I need Your sight to see the way my ev’ry need is met
In Your eyes I see the love that tells me You will not forget

I can see a grander view
Give me eyes to see like You

Give me Your eyes to see the love You showed in saving me from death
Your eyes to see the justice You have worked for the oppressed
I need Your sight to see the way my ev’ry need is met
In Your eyes I see the love that tells me You will not forget

by Ruth Buchanan, as found here
(with the exception of one word, because the song has “yet” instead of “He”…)

While reading the Sola Panel today, I came across an article on Missing Heaven by Paul Grimmond, and then came across a comment made by one of the readers, which has this (italics mine):

I did a survey of the content of the songs sung at the church I attend over a six month period. I was shocked at the difference in doctrinal content between the contemporary choruses (especially from Hillsong and Vineyard) and the hymmns we were singing. But I was also surprised at how often the hymns made mention of heaven, which was the exact opposite of the contemporary songs. Could it be that our changing worship patterns are affecting our conversation and behavior, which has lost sight of heaven?

I thought that was an interesting comment!!

I never actually paid much attention to it before. Either because I listen to LOTS of hymns or because I listen to certain types of Christian songs which do mention heaven???

Although, I suspect it is more because I listen to lots of hymns… Or maybe it just so happens that my current facebook status is a chorus from a hymn that is about heaven! =D (I love that hymn, btw! Especially the hymn. Love it much! =) But I generally love hymns by Fanny Crosby anyway =))

But yeah, I think what the same reader said in his second comment is also true. About how “So many of the hymns had the hope of heaven as a theme in one of the last stanzas”. At least I found it to be true from my experiences with searching and reading / singing through hymn lyrics.

Now that I think about it, that (stanza on heaven) is probably part of the reason why I’ve found it hard so far to find a hymn that would allow me to wallow in my problems or miseries! That is, whenever I’m having a down time and feel like staying there, I can’t really find a hymn that would enable me to stay “feeling down”… Somehow, the hymns would lift my eyes up towards heaven and help me see the heavenly reality of things… There are some hymns that would help me to then look forward towards heaven with joy. But there are others which help me to remember heaven, while acknowledging that we still live in a broken world – but with a hope of heaven one day… But I love them all! =) I love their beautiful lyrics! =) And I guess, I just love hymns! =D

Anyway, ending with lyrics of the hymn that is currently on my facebook status:

At the Breaking of the Day – as found on Cyber Hymnal

Oh, how oft amid our labor
Do we think of what will be
When the boat shall drop its anchor
In the haven o’er the sea!
And our hearts, with joy expanding,
From our trials look away,
When we all shall meet together,
At the breaking of the day!

Refrain
At the breaking of the day,
When we anchor on the shore,
At the breaking of the day,
When the storms of life are o’er,
When our sorrow and our sighing,
Like a dream will pass away,
When we all shall meet together,
At the breaking of the day!

Oh, how oft amid the conflict
And the battle raging high,
With a faith as clear as noonday
We behold the vict’ry nigh,
And we know that with the righteous
We shall stand in bright array,
When we all shall meet together,
At the breaking of the day!
Refrain

Endless praise to our Redeemer
For His all atoning love,
That prepares for us a mansion
And a crown of life above,
Where our eyes shall see the beauty
Of the flow’rs that ne’er decay,
When we all shall meet together,
At the breaking of the day!
Refrain

Words: Fanny Crosby, in Radiant Songs, edited by John Sweney, William Kirkpatrick & Henry L. Gilmour (Philadelphia, Pennsylvania: John J. Hood, 1891).
Music: John R. Sweney

Songs for the Wealthy Beggar by Ruth Buchanan is indeed one of my all-time favourite CDs, if not THE all time favourie CD! =)

I just love the songs! Even though I don’t always get everything rightly – as it doesn’t seem there are printed lyrics – but what I do get is encouraging and challenging enough!

Like the verse I currently have on my facebook status – from How Many Times:

So tell me:
How many times can You forgive?
Why do You still let me live?
When You sent Your Son to die for me,
did You know how bad I’d be,
that I would have to be forgiven over and over again?
…..
And I know:
How many times You can forgive…
I know why You let me live
When You sent Your Son to die for me,
You knew how bad I’d be,
that I would have to be forgiven over and over again…

Or like this one from Your Eyes – another song in the same album:

A man could take a lifetime twice to put away a grudge,
But God had seen the sin of man since Adam came from dust.
He knew the weight of guilt, our past and future wrongs,
Yet sent His Son to die for us, to put away our faithlessness forever…

Powerful Biblical truths, expressed well in good songs!

Really gave me a fresh appreciation of the extent of God’s forgiveness! And His grace and mercy!! And how could God still decided to send Jesus – how could Jesus still decide to give up His life – even when He knew how sinful I would be??!! – Yes, even after being saved and “accepted Him as my Lord”!!!

How could He keep forgiving?!

The depth of His mercy!!!

It is true what people say – you grow in your appreciation of certain truths in the Bible as you experience and see how those truths work out in your lives – so that it is no longer an idea – a head knowledge, but something you know very well and appreciate much. Not that you didn’t appreciate it before. But I guess, you just have a fresh and greater appreciation of it.

Just like that second quote… Before I had to struggle with the idea (and grow in my understanding of) forgiveness, I know that what’s said in that verse is true. But now, I don’t just know it’s true. I know how true it is! I really have come to appreciate its truth!

It is true! A man could take a lifetime twice to put away a grudge. While God, who knew the depth of sin, and weight of guilt, and our past and future wrongs(!!), still chose to send His Son to die for us!!

Amazing pity… Grace unknown… Love beyond degree….

God’s forgiveness: A commitment by the one true God to pardon graciously those who repent and believe so that they are reconciled to Him, although this commitment does not eliminate consequences.

Christians are to forgive as God forgave them, and so:

(Human) Forgiveness: A commitment by the offended to pardon graciously the repentant from moral liability and to be reconciled to that person, although not all consequences are necessarily eliminated.

… Christians should forgive graciously… In biblical forgiveness, the forgiving person pays the price of forgiveness…

From Unpacking Forgiveness by Chris Brauns – THE book I would recommend on the subject of Forgiveness… (well, other than the books of the Bible! =))

It is not often that I like a song written by a modern song writer – and stay liking it for a long while. But have loved this one song ever since I first listened to it.

One and a half months ago, the words of the song resonated greatly with what I was feeling… At the moment, however, I’d say only the last three verses are probably still echoing in my heart/mind…

An interesting thing I’ve noticed this time though, is how quickly I was able to move out of the stage described in verse 2 of the song… While when I first heard it, the feeling in verse 2 actually resonated within me for quite a long time!

I don’t think the length of time was in proportion to the wounds… Rather, I think it was the fact that I have, since then, grown in my understanding, and appreciation of the repeated verses! – opening, closing and two in the middle… Appreciation of God’s loving sovereignty in all things…

And yeah, I think I’ve grown to appreciate the truth of verse 4 a bit more as well… That is, I’ve also matured in my understanding of this broken world. How Christians are bruised and broken people, who carry wounds – that will take time to heal… But it’s OK. Not because things are OK, but because there is nothing that shall separate us from the love of Christ! – nothing in this world, nothing in the world to come, nothing in heavenly realms, nothing in the present, nothing in the future, nothing in all creation that will be able to separate us, separate me, from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord. =)

Song for the Wealthy Beggar

Before the stars of heaven took their place up in the sky,
God had planned that you would be a part of His design,
And even though He knew that you were rebel hearted man,
He planned to bring you back to Him, so you could start again…

But now you’re here, it doesn’t seem God thought of everything,
The roughest things have happened and the future is unclear
And love seems hard to find these days although it’s in demand,
And you have wondered if you’ll like the things that God has planned…

But you have known the path to life, the counsel of the Lord,
His Spirit is alive in you, the promise of reward
and hope is anchored in your soul as you behold the Son
who went before you in your place and waits for you to come

A bruised and broken Christian is but all you’ll ever find
The wounds you carry may run deep, and healing takes some time
But be assured that you are loved, as sure as you are here,
as sure as Jesus died for you, as sure as heaven’s near…

And you have known the path to life, the counsel of the Lord,
His Spirit is alive in you, the promise of reward
and hope is anchored in your soul as you behold the Son
who went before you in your place and waits for you to come

Before the stars of heaven took their place up in the sky,
God had planned that you would be a part of His design,
And even though He knew that you were rebel hearted man,
He planned to bring you back to Him, so you could start again…

Ruth Buchanan, 2000

To purchase Ruth’s CDs, this is the link to her contact page. I love her songs! Although of course her album Song for the Wealthy Beggar is my favourite. =)

Hoping to find some time this week to blog / write more about this… But in case I don’t get a chance, I thought I should post this quote here first. Read it slowly, try to appreciate each part – and if you are like me, you would appreciate how evil and awful sin is, and how much against God it is…

“In short, sin is the dare of God’s justice, the rape of his mercy, the jeer of his patience, the slight of his power, the contempt of his love, as one writer prettily expresses this ugly thing. We may go on and say, it is the upbraiding of his providence (Psalm 50), the scoff of his promise (2 Peter 3.3-4), the reproach of his wisdom (Isaiah 29.16). And as is said of the Man of Sin (i.e. who is made up of sin) it opposes and exalts itself above all that is called God (and above all that God is called), so that it as God sitteth in the temple of God, showing itself as if it were God (2 Thessalonians 2.4)” (from The Sinfulness of Sins by Ralph Venning)

That paragraph really made me angry at sin! And helped me appreciate the vileness of sin – to the extent that I can’t describe with words!!

And from the above and what I’ve read so far, I have also been reminded that without a firm grasp of the grace of God, contemplations on the subject of the sinfulness of sin would just be too much! Because sin is really ugly! And it is so nauseating! And I just can’t see how someone can contemplate the depth of his/her offences against God, without having a firm grasp of grace of God in Christ! Because it would just be too much…

So it is true. A growing understanding in the sinfulness of sin will help us appreciate the depth of God’s grace and mercy even more. But I think without a firm grasp of God’s grace and mercy in the first place, we won’t be able to cope with what we will be presented with in the process of growing our understanding of sin.

But then again, I think even without a firm grasp of God’s grace, the sinfulness of sin is something to be preached to everyone. Because it would lead people to appreciate grace more? And to see how vile sin is???

Hmm… about to go to a meeting, so not thinking and not expressing myself clearly… But thought I post it here now anyway =)

One thing I’ve grown to appreciate better in the past few days (from my morning alone time with God) is Joseph’s trust in God.

I know that he expressed his trust in God clearly in Genesis 45. But in the past few days, I’ve realised that even along the ways, Joseph did express great trust in God despite the situations that God has put him in!

I mean, I’m only up to chapter 40 this morning. But so far, after being sold, I’ve found two examples of his trust in God already!

First one, in Genesis 39:9 – Joseph resisted temptation from Potiphar’s wife and said “How then can I do this great wickedness and sin against God?”

Joseph still trusted in God and fear Him! Even after being treated unkindly by his brothers and sold to Egypt (after being thrown inside a pit and finding out that his brothers actually planned to kill him, too!!)

Then today in Genesis 40:8 – Joseph again expressed great trust in God!!

“Do not interpretations belong to God? Please tell them to me.”

His faith in God didn’t falter. Even after being mistreated by his brothers, and then being sold to Egypt, being mistreated by his owner’s wife, and unfairly put into prison(!)… He still trusted in God! I found that to be amazing!

I know not everyone will think this is a great discovery by me =) but I am very thankful to God for helping me to have a fresh appreciation of Joseph’s faith in Him!

I’m in my 7th cycle reading through the OT. And I have read Genesis at other times as well. But one thing that I’ve asked from God is that He will help me so I won’t approach His word with a “I know and have read this already” attitude.

The past few weeks have found me praying and asking God that He would please help me to really enjoy the time that I spend with Him. Time spent getting to know Him better through His word. And a chance to love Him better through my growing knowledge of Him! And of course, asking Him for a humble heart and grace to help me live my life in a way that would be pleasing to Him! =)

So yeah, I am thankful to be given fresh appreciation of Joseph’s faith in God, and of his trust that has encouraged me to keep trusting in God and doing the right thing by God in whatever situation He has put me in…

Also thankful to God for the many other things He has kindly revealed to me through the other books I’m currently reading – Job, Mark and Romans! =) Thankful to God for M’Cheyne and his desire for people to know God better through His word and so for his Bible reading scheme. Thankful to God for Don Carson’s For the Love of God and for introducing M’Cheyne’s Bible reading scheme to new generations of people! =) Thankful to God for revealing Himself through His written word! Thankful to God for the freedom that I have to own a Bible. Thankful for the privilege of being able to set aside an hour each morning. And of course, thankful to God for Jesus and His Holy Spirit – without whom I would not be in a relationship with Him in the first place – and all these things – will be of no value to me!! =D

First time I was told that I was ready to spread out my wings and fly, I actually went straight to the ground! I fell. And not only I failed to fly, I actually broke my wings pretty badly… Which was a really sad thing. Took some time for me to recover! Nursing my broken wings and rebuilding strength…

That, was a ages ago…

Today, however, unexpectedly, I was told I’m ready to spread out my wings and to try flying on my own again! =) Which was very surprising to me, considering what I’d just been through and considering the level of my self-confidence at the moment…

Well, I was told that if I really feel I’m not ready, I can just try jumping a bit higher for a start! =P (I guess as a part of building up my confidence as well… =))

Honestly, I am a bit scared – just because of what happened last time, I guess =) It was such a bad fall!! And I was a lot more confident then…

But see, the thing is… The first time I was told that – the weather was nice, and I guess, I’d been practicing and preparing myself to fly on a nice weather… And so when a strong wind blew, I fell because my wings were not strong enough, and I was not really ready to fly alone – in all kinds of weather.

But now, I’d been told that I’m ready to fly again straight after a big storm!

I’d been practicing and strengthening my wings during the storms that it is now believed that I’ll be fine flying alone. And I found that to be very encouraging (although I’m still in disbelief!)… I mean, it is one thing to be told that your wings were strong enough when the weather was fair. But to be told that your wings are strong enough because you’ve just proven that you could withstand the storm – and a big one at that – that was a very encouraging comment! =)

But the thing is, it is precisely because I was told of that just after a big storm, I could also see, and fully appreciate that this is all God’s works! Really! I mean, I have no confidence in myself whatsoever. Without him, I wouldn’t even try getting out of my nest. But yeah, because of the timing, I actually could really see that God was the One who’s helped me survived the storm. And not only that, He’s also shown and reminded me again that storms really are good times to build up strength (Heb 12:12-13)! =D

I asked the Lord that I might grow
In faith, and love, and every grace;
Might more of His salvation know,
And seek, more earnestly, His face.

’Twas He who taught me thus to pray,
And He, I trust, has answered prayer!
But it has been in such a way,
As almost drove me to despair.

I hoped that in some favored hour,
At once He’d answer my request;
And by His love’s constraining pow’r,
Subdue my sins, and give me rest.

Instead of this, He made me feel
The hidden evils of my heart;
And let the angry pow’rs of hell
Assault my soul in every part.

Yea more, with His own hand He seemed
Intent to aggravate my woe;
Crossed all the fair designs I schemed,
Blasted my gourds, and laid me low.

Lord, why is this, I trembling cried,
Wilt thou pursue thy worm to death?
“’Tis in this way, the Lord replied,
I answer prayer for grace and faith.

These inward trials I employ,
From self, and pride, to set thee free;
And break thy schemes of earthly joy,
That thou may’st find thy all in Me.”

Words by John Newton, as found in the Cyber Hymnal.