It is not often that I like a song written by a modern song writer – and stay liking it for a long while. But have loved this one song ever since I first listened to it.

One and a half months ago, the words of the song resonated greatly with what I was feeling… At the moment, however, I’d say only the last three verses are probably still echoing in my heart/mind…

An interesting thing I’ve noticed this time though, is how quickly I was able to move out of the stage described in verse 2 of the song… While when I first heard it, the feeling in verse 2 actually resonated within me for quite a long time!

I don’t think the length of time was in proportion to the wounds… Rather, I think it was the fact that I have, since then, grown in my understanding, and appreciation of the repeated verses! – opening, closing and two in the middle… Appreciation of God’s loving sovereignty in all things…

And yeah, I think I’ve grown to appreciate the truth of verse 4 a bit more as well… That is, I’ve also matured in my understanding of this broken world. How Christians are bruised and broken people, who carry wounds – that will take time to heal… But it’s OK. Not because things are OK, but because there is nothing that shall separate us from the love of Christ! – nothing in this world, nothing in the world to come, nothing in heavenly realms, nothing in the present, nothing in the future, nothing in all creation that will be able to separate us, separate me, from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord. =)

Song for the Wealthy Beggar

Before the stars of heaven took their place up in the sky,
God had planned that you would be a part of His design,
And even though He knew that you were rebel hearted man,
He planned to bring you back to Him, so you could start again…

But now you’re here, it doesn’t seem God thought of everything,
The roughest things have happened and the future is unclear
And love seems hard to find these days although it’s in demand,
And you have wondered if you’ll like the things that God has planned…

But you have known the path to life, the counsel of the Lord,
His Spirit is alive in you, the promise of reward
and hope is anchored in your soul as you behold the Son
who went before you in your place and waits for you to come

A bruised and broken Christian is but all you’ll ever find
The wounds you carry may run deep, and healing takes some time
But be assured that you are loved, as sure as you are here,
as sure as Jesus died for you, as sure as heaven’s near…

And you have known the path to life, the counsel of the Lord,
His Spirit is alive in you, the promise of reward
and hope is anchored in your soul as you behold the Son
who went before you in your place and waits for you to come

Before the stars of heaven took their place up in the sky,
God had planned that you would be a part of His design,
And even though He knew that you were rebel hearted man,
He planned to bring you back to Him, so you could start again…

Ruth Buchanan, 2000

To purchase Ruth’s CDs, this is the link to her contact page. I love her songs! Although of course her album Song for the Wealthy Beggar is my favourite. =)

Hoping to find some time this week to blog / write more about this… But in case I don’t get a chance, I thought I should post this quote here first. Read it slowly, try to appreciate each part – and if you are like me, you would appreciate how evil and awful sin is, and how much against God it is…

“In short, sin is the dare of God’s justice, the rape of his mercy, the jeer of his patience, the slight of his power, the contempt of his love, as one writer prettily expresses this ugly thing. We may go on and say, it is the upbraiding of his providence (Psalm 50), the scoff of his promise (2 Peter 3.3-4), the reproach of his wisdom (Isaiah 29.16). And as is said of the Man of Sin (i.e. who is made up of sin) it opposes and exalts itself above all that is called God (and above all that God is called), so that it as God sitteth in the temple of God, showing itself as if it were God (2 Thessalonians 2.4)” (from The Sinfulness of Sins by Ralph Venning)

That paragraph really made me angry at sin! And helped me appreciate the vileness of sin – to the extent that I can’t describe with words!!

And from the above and what I’ve read so far, I have also been reminded that without a firm grasp of the grace of God, contemplations on the subject of the sinfulness of sin would just be too much! Because sin is really ugly! And it is so nauseating! And I just can’t see how someone can contemplate the depth of his/her offences against God, without having a firm grasp of grace of God in Christ! Because it would just be too much…

So it is true. A growing understanding in the sinfulness of sin will help us appreciate the depth of God’s grace and mercy even more. But I think without a firm grasp of God’s grace and mercy in the first place, we won’t be able to cope with what we will be presented with in the process of growing our understanding of sin.

But then again, I think even without a firm grasp of God’s grace, the sinfulness of sin is something to be preached to everyone. Because it would lead people to appreciate grace more? And to see how vile sin is???

Hmm… about to go to a meeting, so not thinking and not expressing myself clearly… But thought I post it here now anyway =)

One thing I’ve grown to appreciate better in the past few days (from my morning alone time with God) is Joseph’s trust in God.

I know that he expressed his trust in God clearly in Genesis 45. But in the past few days, I’ve realised that even along the ways, Joseph did express great trust in God despite the situations that God has put him in!

I mean, I’m only up to chapter 40 this morning. But so far, after being sold, I’ve found two examples of his trust in God already!

First one, in Genesis 39:9 – Joseph resisted temptation from Potiphar’s wife and said “How then can I do this great wickedness and sin against God?”

Joseph still trusted in God and fear Him! Even after being treated unkindly by his brothers and sold to Egypt (after being thrown inside a pit and finding out that his brothers actually planned to kill him, too!!)

Then today in Genesis 40:8 – Joseph again expressed great trust in God!!

“Do not interpretations belong to God? Please tell them to me.”

His faith in God didn’t falter. Even after being mistreated by his brothers, and then being sold to Egypt, being mistreated by his owner’s wife, and unfairly put into prison(!)… He still trusted in God! I found that to be amazing!

I know not everyone will think this is a great discovery by me =) but I am very thankful to God for helping me to have a fresh appreciation of Joseph’s faith in Him!

I’m in my 7th cycle reading through the OT. And I have read Genesis at other times as well. But one thing that I’ve asked from God is that He will help me so I won’t approach His word with a “I know and have read this already” attitude.

The past few weeks have found me praying and asking God that He would please help me to really enjoy the time that I spend with Him. Time spent getting to know Him better through His word. And a chance to love Him better through my growing knowledge of Him! And of course, asking Him for a humble heart and grace to help me live my life in a way that would be pleasing to Him! =)

So yeah, I am thankful to be given fresh appreciation of Joseph’s faith in God, and of his trust that has encouraged me to keep trusting in God and doing the right thing by God in whatever situation He has put me in…

Also thankful to God for the many other things He has kindly revealed to me through the other books I’m currently reading – Job, Mark and Romans! =) Thankful to God for M’Cheyne and his desire for people to know God better through His word and so for his Bible reading scheme. Thankful to God for Don Carson’s For the Love of God and for introducing M’Cheyne’s Bible reading scheme to new generations of people! =) Thankful to God for revealing Himself through His written word! Thankful to God for the freedom that I have to own a Bible. Thankful for the privilege of being able to set aside an hour each morning. And of course, thankful to God for Jesus and His Holy Spirit – without whom I would not be in a relationship with Him in the first place – and all these things – will be of no value to me!! =D

First time I was told that I was ready to spread out my wings and fly, I actually went straight to the ground! I fell. And not only I failed to fly, I actually broke my wings pretty badly… Which was a really sad thing. Took some time for me to recover! Nursing my broken wings and rebuilding strength…

That, was a ages ago…

Today, however, unexpectedly, I was told I’m ready to spread out my wings and to try flying on my own again! =) Which was very surprising to me, considering what I’d just been through and considering the level of my self-confidence at the moment…

Well, I was told that if I really feel I’m not ready, I can just try jumping a bit higher for a start! =P (I guess as a part of building up my confidence as well… =))

Honestly, I am a bit scared – just because of what happened last time, I guess =) It was such a bad fall!! And I was a lot more confident then…

But see, the thing is… The first time I was told that – the weather was nice, and I guess, I’d been practicing and preparing myself to fly on a nice weather… And so when a strong wind blew, I fell because my wings were not strong enough, and I was not really ready to fly alone – in all kinds of weather.

But now, I’d been told that I’m ready to fly again straight after a big storm!

I’d been practicing and strengthening my wings during the storms that it is now believed that I’ll be fine flying alone. And I found that to be very encouraging (although I’m still in disbelief!)… I mean, it is one thing to be told that your wings were strong enough when the weather was fair. But to be told that your wings are strong enough because you’ve just proven that you could withstand the storm – and a big one at that – that was a very encouraging comment! =)

But the thing is, it is precisely because I was told of that just after a big storm, I could also see, and fully appreciate that this is all God’s works! Really! I mean, I have no confidence in myself whatsoever. Without him, I wouldn’t even try getting out of my nest. But yeah, because of the timing, I actually could really see that God was the One who’s helped me survived the storm. And not only that, He’s also shown and reminded me again that storms really are good times to build up strength (Heb 12:12-13)! =D

I asked the Lord that I might grow
In faith, and love, and every grace;
Might more of His salvation know,
And seek, more earnestly, His face.

’Twas He who taught me thus to pray,
And He, I trust, has answered prayer!
But it has been in such a way,
As almost drove me to despair.

I hoped that in some favored hour,
At once He’d answer my request;
And by His love’s constraining pow’r,
Subdue my sins, and give me rest.

Instead of this, He made me feel
The hidden evils of my heart;
And let the angry pow’rs of hell
Assault my soul in every part.

Yea more, with His own hand He seemed
Intent to aggravate my woe;
Crossed all the fair designs I schemed,
Blasted my gourds, and laid me low.

Lord, why is this, I trembling cried,
Wilt thou pursue thy worm to death?
“’Tis in this way, the Lord replied,
I answer prayer for grace and faith.

These inward trials I employ,
From self, and pride, to set thee free;
And break thy schemes of earthly joy,
That thou may’st find thy all in Me.”

Words by John Newton, as found in the Cyber Hymnal.

I know that we should not show favouritism to anyone ;p but had the privilege today to meet (again) with one of the people mentioned here. =)

Congratulated him, and as I was about to leave his office, I thanked him for the encouragement he gave – as mentioned / quoted in the article. And he encouraged me to keep pressing on! =D

Going through different hymns, trying to find one (or a few) that I can sing to myself, and came across one below.

While reading/singing through the second verse, a passage came to mind – Matthew 18:2ff, and while checking realised that I was probably thinking about Matthew 19:13-15 – passages that tell stories about Jesus and little children…

And somehow, an image just came to mind – a little girl running to her dad, crying, showing him her scraped knee, and asking him to make it better for her – trusting, fully trusting, that he’ll be able to make it better for her. Even if it’s just through comforting words or loving gestures… She knows that he’ll make it better for her. She knows she can find comfort in him, and that somehow, her dad will make her scraped knee OK again… And then everything, will be OK again, too… =)

Safe is my refuge, sweet is my rest,
Ill cannot harm me, nor foes e’er molest;
Jesus my spirit so tenderly calms,
Holding me close in His mighty arms.

Refrain
Oh! what wonderful, wonderful rest!
Trusting completely in Jesus I’m blest;
Sweetly He comforts and shields from alarms,
Holding me safe in His mighty arms.

Pressing my tear stained cheek to His own,
Hushing my grief with His sweet gentle tone;
Touching my heart with His healing balms,
Holding me still in His mighty arms.
Refrain

Tempests may rage, sin’s surges may beat,
Ne’er can they reach my sheltered retreat;
Free from all danger, from dread alarms,
Resting so safe in His mighty arms.
Refrain

From the Cyber Hymnal: Held in His Mighty Arms by Winfield Macomber

When I was small, storms were nightmares! I hate thunders! They were just so scary! And because lightning preceded thunder, I didn’t like lightnings either! They were just awful!!

But now that I’m much much older =) I’m no longer scared of storms. I kind of love them even. Well, when I I’m safe inside my house of course! =P

But somehow, deep down, I think my fear of storm is no longer here – not just because I’m much older, but also because I no longer fear death or the power of nature over me. I guess, I’ve just come to know the Lord of nature and that’s why I really no longer fear the storms – both literal, and metaphorical storms! =)

You see, last week, on my way back from Taronga Zoo, I actually experienced a really strong wind that marked the beginning of a storm. The waves hit the Taronga Zoo wharf really hard! They were really high! And people were getting wet when they tried to get on the ferry. That was the first time I experienced something like that since I became a Taronga Zoo member (which was a few years ago =))! And so most people decided to sit inside once they got on to the ferry because of the strong wind and waves.

But I decided to stand outside – because it was a lot more fun! =)

Standing outside, looking at the sky, the waves and the wind helped me to appreciate some passages in the Bible better! =) One was the passage about Jesus calming the storm. Imagine! His power!!

And then there is also that other passage about Jesus walking on the water and then Peter trying to do the same, but then distracted from Jesus and focused instead on the situations around him (the troubled water) and so almost got drowned… Reminded me that when you are going through the storms of life – keep your eyes on Jesus. Don’t be distracted by the troubled waters and you will be fine. Once you lose focus – you are in trouble!! =)

Really appreciated God’s reminders! =D

And of course, as a hymn person, another one of my all-time-favourite hymns also came to mind:

Dark is the night, and cold the wind is blowing,
Nearer and nearer comes the breakers’ roar;
Where shall I go, or whither fly for refuge?
Hide me, my Father, till the storm is o’er.

Refrain
With His loving hand to guide, let the clouds above me roll,
And the billows in their fury dash around me.
I can brave the wildest storm, with His glory in my soul,
I can sing amidst the tempest—Praise the Lord!

Dark is the night, but cheering is the promise,
He will go with me o’er the troubled wave;
Safe He will lead me through the pathless waters,
Jesus, the mighty One, and strong to save.
Refrain

Dark is the night, but lo! the day is breaking,
Onward my bark, unfurl thy every sail,
Now at the helm I see my Father standing,
Soon will my anchor drop within the veil.
Refrain

From Cyber Hymnal

I really love this hymn, especially its chorus because it’s just so full of courage. Fearless. It even almost come across as a challenge – like “come what may, I’ll be fine in Christ” sort of attitude.

So yeah, I love this hymn! =) Never failed to encourage me during the wildest storms of life! =)

Q: What does it mean to be slow to anger? How to express anger? Not repressing anger? etc
A: Analyse why is it that I’m angry. What am I trying to achieve? What is it that I’m frustrated with? Stop rather than just keep going with our charge of anger.
Stop. Use anger as a guide, to work out what the problem is.
Stop. What am I trying to achieve? Ask people questions. Listen to them. If anger is justified, try to find reconciliation. Hopefully the person will say sorry.
A gentle answer turns away wrath (Prov 12:18).

Q: Baptism of the Holy Spirit – when?
A: Only way to be a believer is by having the Holy Spirit. If no Holy Spirit, then can’t be a believer.

* Love is more than just emotions. It is motivation and action.
Romans 14:23 – anything doesn’t proceed from faith is sin.

Q: Feeling “high” after singing at church, but then after a while feeling low. How to maintain spiritual high?
A: Do not confuse emotional high with spiritual high. No such thing as spiritual high! You can get equally / same emotional high from something that has nothing to do with Jesus.
There is a problem with equalising emotional high with spiritual high.

Q: When you understand the love of God you no longer fear man. But what about Peter in Galatians?
A: If we understand God’s love clearly –> not fear man. We are still not perfect, Peter included. We still sin and Peter also failed at that time.

Q: “Reformed Charismatics” – mixture of emotions and Calvinist Theology – support them?
A: No. Why? Because Calvinist theology has more than enough emotions already! Calvinists have a good understanding of the Holy Spirit already, so Reformed Charismatics is actually a step back.
Should some churches have more emotions? Depends on whether it will be more edifying.
But Reformed Charismatics are just confused – they do not really understand what Charismatic is by definition.
[do NOT quote my answer as exact words used by Phillip, please. English is my second language, I only noted down what I could get...]

Q: Playing music while praying – emotionally manipulative?
–> judgement call, can be confusing (the sound) to some people, also there is a danger of “feeling closer to God” because of the music, rather than through the Spirit of God.

* Loving people inside and outside the church differently.
Love is generous giving to people, whether they deserve it or not.
Gal 6 – do good, especially in the household of faith.
Ezekiel 33 – context: watchman’s responsibility over Israel. 1 Cor 5 – similar idea – not all evil in the world.

Q: High degree of emotional pain, but doesn’t want to rely on substances, but only on the Christian faith?
A: We live in 20th Century. Medicines are blessings. So we can take medicine.
Our problem of thinking that mental/emotional/brain problem being separate from physical body/problem. But actually isn’t.
I am my physical body. Yes, I am more than my physical body, but I am my physical body. If my body needs medication to function better – then can take them.
At the same time, be careful, making sure that we only follow trusted advice, rather than just short term solution (incl. alcohol or other substances).
But just like we don’t mind taking medication when our foot is in pain, for example – we don’t have to mind using medication for brain.
No promise in the Bible that Jesus will remove our pain. God is merciful. But in His mercy, He might think that the pain is what’s best for us.

Q: If Christians struggle to feel emotions, should they work on becoming more emotional?
A: Not really. We are who we are. People see things differently. But some men repress emotions, and if it is a problem, would need help.

* Manipulation: putting pressure to people that’s unfair. There’s a terrific power in group.
–> people being in the in group and out group by agreeing to the power-holder –> manipulation.
–> must always be careful to give individuals in the group enough room to be responsible to make their own decision – to do what they want to do / think right to do.
Holy Laughter – sense of manipulation. Standing in front of the audience and doing nothing until someone starts giggling, and then another person and then another person – then the whole place – and then “the Spirit is here” – but that’s actually manipulation.

Q: Are David’s expression of anger at his enemies appropriate for Christians today?
A: Bible isn’t just two dimensional!
Psalm 137 – b/o the horror of what the Babylonians did to Israel – blessed are those who punish them.

Q: Counsellors & Psychologists – for or against the Bible?
A: Biblical counselling – helpful. But counselling can also be done in an unbiblical way. Counselling ways – some are more able to connect to the Bible than others.
But Christian counsellors are something we need to thank God for.

Q: Since we are meant to love our enemies, what emotions should we have towards them? Should we like them?
A: Liking them will help us loving them. And knowing them will help us liking them.
In dealing with our enemies, we need to be careful about anger. Need to be mindful or our feelings. Man’s anger doesn’t bring out the righteousness that God requires.

Q: Emotionalism vs Experientialism?
A: Not much. Emotionalism is a subset of Experientialism.

[Out of all the talks, this is one that I felt I took less notes, maybe because this was the last one, and I was finding it hard to concentrate already?]

1. POWER

Sometimes people are afraid of their emotions because of the power of emotions that they can feel. The surge of emotions that people have.

They fear of losing control of their emotions. Also because Bible says that self-control is the Fruit of the Spirit.

People have fear of emotions, not realising that the fear of emotions itself is an emotion. It is an emotional reaction to emotion.

2. JOY

One of the most powerful emotions is joy – it is taught consistently in the Bible – to be joyful all the time.

2 Cor 13:11 – Rejoice.
Joy – pure emotion. The lifting of one’s spirit. E.g. sheer pleasure of holding the newborn baby.
Joy in so many things.

Key to rejoicing is the object of our rejoicing. And that’s why we always have something to rejoice in.

3. GOD AND JOY

God rejoices. God delights in things.
Isaiah 62:1-5. God delights over Israel, over His people, like a bridegroom rejoices over His bride.
Isaiah 65:17ff (?) – joy over every individual within the nation.
Ezekiel – God doesn’t rejoice in death of a sinner. ALso in Luke 15 – joy in the parable of the lost coin and lost sheep and lost son.
Luke 15:7 – God rejoices over a sinner’s repentance. Contrasting the moralistic Pharisees with joyful God who delights in repentance and salvation.

Atheists: If God exists, then you have something to worry about
–> TRUE, unless you know Christ.

Atheists: If God exists, then you have no joy in living
–> FALSE, if you know Christ.

But of course Atheists think like that because they don’t know the loving mercy of God our Heavenly Father!

4. OUR JOY

a. In our Salvation

Our joy is first in our salvation.
Rescued. More than just from wrath to come, but also being brought into the family of God.

Luke 10:17-20 – rejoice that your names are written in heaven.
The joy that Christians have that can’t be taken away from them – because it’s written in Jesus’ blood by the Holy Spirit.

Acts 13:48

b. In God

Rejoice in God Himself.

Luther on Romans:

“Night and day I pondered, until I finally saw the connection
between the righteousness of God and the statement that ‘the righteous
live by faith.’ I grasped that the righteousness of God is that
righteousness by which — through sheer grace and mercy — God
justifies us through faith. Thereupon I felt myself to be reborn and to
have gone through an open door into paradise. The whole of scripture
took on a new meaning, and whereas before the ‘righteousness of God’
had filled me with hate, now it became to me inexpressibly sw eet in
greater love. This passage of Paul became to me a gate to heaven . . . .”

Christians are not only forgiven. We are adopted into the very family of God. And so we rejoice in God!

c. In our Sufferings

Isaiah, Elijah, all God’s prophets suffered.

Servant not greater than His Master. Acts 4 – rejoicing that they were counted worthy to suffer for Jesus.

James 1: it is at the gym that we grow our muscles. Romans 5: suffering produces hope.

Dentist – we pay to suffer because we know it’s good for us.
God has our best interest at heart. God will transform us to be more like Jesus, holy, heavenly. What’s more, it’s free!

Suffering can never take from us what matters.

As Luther we say that suffering can never take from us what matters – even though he was someone who really was in danger and so the words might have more weight coming from him than from us:

The Word they still shall let remain nor any thanks have for it;
He’s by our side upon the plain with His good gifts and Spirit.
And take they our life, goods, fame, child and wife,
Let these all be gone, they yet have nothing won;
The Kingdom ours remaineth.

Phil 1:21 – For to me to live is Christ, and to die is gain.
–> who needs a better motto than this?

d. In each other

We rejoice together as we encourage each other.
1 Thes 2:19-20 – joyful in each other’s faith.
1 Thes 3:8-10.

CONCLUSION

What’s important is our act of obedience to our Heavenly Father.
We are not to ignore, nor to be dominated by our emotions, nor by our minds, but by our Lord Jesus Christ.

1. DISPLAYS

[see separate note]

2. SORROW

Sorrow is a very basic emotion. Covers a whole range of emotions.

Not talking about sorrow involved in those suffering from clinical depression.

Normal emotion of sorrow that we feel from time to time – because of a difficulty in life etc.

There are many proper occasions to be sad. Sorrow will not be done away until the Lord Jesus Christ returns. This is a world of deep sorrow.

Often people display sadness or sorrow. But we must not confuse emotions with displays of emotions. And we mustn’t confuse displays of emotions with true spirituality / as a sign of true spirituality.

3. GOD AND SORROW

We can’t move emotions out of the Bible. In the Bible, God grieves over the sinfulness of Israel.

Isaiah 63:7-10 and Eph 4:30 – we grieve the Holy Spirit of God when we sin –> Christians must not grieve God the Holy Spirit!

What pain did God suffer when Jesus died for the sin of the whole world!

Man of Sorrows! what a name
For the Son of God, who came
Ruined sinners to reclaim.
Hallelujah! What a Savior!

4. OUR SORROW

Our sorrow should reflect God’s.

Even though we don’t grieve as those without hope, Christians still grieve. Even Jesus wept (John 11:35).

Ecclesiastes 7:2 – wisdom from funeral house.

Sorrow and pain are difficult emotions, but they help us ponder life and focus on God.

Psalm 137 – time for sorrow, grieve and sadness.

God promises in Isaiah 61 that mourners will be comforted.

Christians are optimists in this Anno Domini (the Year of the Lord), but we are also people who acknowledge reality – the fallenness of this world.

2 Cor 7:8-10 – two kind of grief
grief –> bitterness –> death
grief –> repentance –> life
–> difference – what we do with our sadness and grieve –> we can use it for the good of others or we can wallow in it.

Again, remember, we can display emotions, but we don’t have to. We need to consider what’s helpful to others.